Here are some super fun things I've heard in the bath lately:
Can you brush duck's teeth, and octopus's teeth too?
(Putting some soap on the washcloth) I'm going to wash the cloth's hair!
(Jumping up and down on the mat after getting out of the tub) I'm a cuddlebug! I'm a pickle!
And, my favorite dialog, maybe of all time:
A: What can I do in the tub? Can I poop in the tub?
Me: NO!
A: Can I hop in the tub?
Me: Uh, no. Absolutely not.
A: (hanging head in mock sadness) Oh. (brightens up) Can I meow in the tub?
Me: Yes! You can meow all you want to!
No meowing. End of conversation. Just fact finding I guess.
Bath time is a real party around here!
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Thursday, October 24, 2013
Just Let Me Get Through The Next 9 Days
There is so much going on right now that it's hard to even collect my thoughts. Most of the big events revolve around A. We're preparing for her first launch into the world, and we are all three amped up and anxious about it.
She said goodbye to her beloved babysitter this week, as she'll be starting preschool at the end of next week. I don't think she knows that she won't be going over there regularly, like she's done for 2 1/2 of her 3 years in this world. She doesn't know what it's like to miss people, or experiences. She has no idea what she's in for, but she knows something is different.
I wish that situation could just go on forever, because it was perfect. I knew she was being cared for by someone who loved her, and she had the great fortune of getting socialized with two other great kids who just happened to be her second cousins too. But schedules change, situations change and evolution is necessary, so we're moving on to something new.
I think she's ready for preschool. I think she's going to do wonderfully in a structured environment, learning all kinds of new and exciting things, with lots of other kids to learn to get along with. But, honestly, we are anxious for many reasons.
She's been having some crazy outbursts lately. Lots of bull-headed resistance to regular, every day things, like, putting on pants, going outside, or staying in her damn bed at night. Not to mention, her sleep pattern is just messed up. Still waking up in the middle of the night, still staying up as long as she can. She's killing us, but she's also not getting enough rest, hence the out-of-control behavior. Luckily, this usually happens in the afternoon, so hopefully she'll be home by the time the cork pops off so her preschool teacher doesn't know that we are failures at getting our child to sleep.
Preschool is a place where time is limited, so what's going to happen when she decides she doesn't want to so something different at that particular moment? Will she freak out, or will she adapt? We shall see. I'm pulling for her. Is she going to read out loud at the top of her lungs during quiet time, or is she actually going to give her teacher a break? Yikes. Hopefully they won't throw my little monkey out of the zoo for insubordination. I don't know any other zookeepers that can make the time commitment we need.
Another milestone coming up is her third birthday. This year, two separate parties. One for family, that should be small and civilized, and one for friends that's going to be a wild rager. I don't know why I can't control myself with the old guest list. I feel like I need to go big, and it makes my life way, way more difficult. What was I thinking? (How can she be three already???)
And then there's school picture day (Will she let me comb her hair? Will she look at the camera? Will she insist on dressing like a crazy person?), her three year wellness check up at the doctor (No shots this round), and Halloween (they're taking bets in Vegas as to whether she will wear the bear costume that she asked for and that I spent a good deal of money on).
Things are hectic and stressful at work, and I'm not sure how I'm going to pull all this off. I will, for sure, and it's all going to be exciting and fun. But I'm gonna need a serious nap on November 2, and I'd better get it.
She said goodbye to her beloved babysitter this week, as she'll be starting preschool at the end of next week. I don't think she knows that she won't be going over there regularly, like she's done for 2 1/2 of her 3 years in this world. She doesn't know what it's like to miss people, or experiences. She has no idea what she's in for, but she knows something is different.
I wish that situation could just go on forever, because it was perfect. I knew she was being cared for by someone who loved her, and she had the great fortune of getting socialized with two other great kids who just happened to be her second cousins too. But schedules change, situations change and evolution is necessary, so we're moving on to something new.
I think she's ready for preschool. I think she's going to do wonderfully in a structured environment, learning all kinds of new and exciting things, with lots of other kids to learn to get along with. But, honestly, we are anxious for many reasons.
She's been having some crazy outbursts lately. Lots of bull-headed resistance to regular, every day things, like, putting on pants, going outside, or staying in her damn bed at night. Not to mention, her sleep pattern is just messed up. Still waking up in the middle of the night, still staying up as long as she can. She's killing us, but she's also not getting enough rest, hence the out-of-control behavior. Luckily, this usually happens in the afternoon, so hopefully she'll be home by the time the cork pops off so her preschool teacher doesn't know that we are failures at getting our child to sleep.
Preschool is a place where time is limited, so what's going to happen when she decides she doesn't want to so something different at that particular moment? Will she freak out, or will she adapt? We shall see. I'm pulling for her. Is she going to read out loud at the top of her lungs during quiet time, or is she actually going to give her teacher a break? Yikes. Hopefully they won't throw my little monkey out of the zoo for insubordination. I don't know any other zookeepers that can make the time commitment we need.
Another milestone coming up is her third birthday. This year, two separate parties. One for family, that should be small and civilized, and one for friends that's going to be a wild rager. I don't know why I can't control myself with the old guest list. I feel like I need to go big, and it makes my life way, way more difficult. What was I thinking? (How can she be three already???)
And then there's school picture day (Will she let me comb her hair? Will she look at the camera? Will she insist on dressing like a crazy person?), her three year wellness check up at the doctor (No shots this round), and Halloween (they're taking bets in Vegas as to whether she will wear the bear costume that she asked for and that I spent a good deal of money on).
Things are hectic and stressful at work, and I'm not sure how I'm going to pull all this off. I will, for sure, and it's all going to be exciting and fun. But I'm gonna need a serious nap on November 2, and I'd better get it.
Saturday, October 12, 2013
Photo Show - Pumpkins & Animals
It's Fall! Best season of the whole year. Sweaters, boots, changing leaves, holidays, birthdays and pumpkins. Here are some photos from a pumpkin patch and animal farm we enjoyed today:
Behold the Rooster!
Mr. Peacock
Two Day Old Piglets
Gimme Some Food!
The Search
I don't know. Maybe crows were scared.
Pumpkin pile
More pumpkin pile
Thanks to Jessica for the great idea. We really enjoyed Fairbank Animal Farm and Pumpkin Patch!
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Everything You Say
The sleep is looking better. We've had a few nights in the last week of sleeping through the night. Yay!
The behavior is looking better. More sleep = more happy all around.
We are now deep in the phase called Monkey See, Monkey Do, with a subtitle of Monkey Hear, Monkey Say.
For the most part, it's nothing but super cute. Seeing her do really sweet and affectionate things based on how she is treated is very encouraging. She holds her toddler mirror up to us and we see that we are actually doing some things right! We are making progress toward the main goal of raising a good human. Yay!
We also see behavior that I hope continues forever. She is the best helper around the house. We can't unload the dishwasher, do the dishes, sweep the floor or unload the groceries without her coming running from the other end of the house to help. And, she's actually pretty helpful! Keep it up, little lady. Mama likes a good helper, and Daddy's not always into it.
She is hanging on every word, even when we think she's not listening. We talk a lot around here, to each other, and to her, and she seems to have a great ability for language. She talks - all the time. She talks in full, multiple word sentences. She talks in past, present and future tense, in first, second and third person. She sounds out the letters of the alphabet. She can spell her name. Every day she says new words that we have no idea where they came from. Strangers can even mostly understand what she's saying. It's amazing, and impressive.
She has also repeated some words, in the correct context and with maximum impact, that she'd better never say in preschool or in front of anyone else. Words that bring deep shame into the hearts of her parents, who know it's wrong, but let them fly in front of her anyway. Words that will get her, and definitely her parents, the wrong kind of reputation. Words that leave us speechless, and that leave her extremely satisfied because she knows she just got away with it. She's a smart cookie, and the child of a couple of soon-to-be-reformed trucker mouths.
The first time the words come out in her sweet little voice, it's all we can do not to laugh because it's so adorable. But we can't encourage this, right? We are such hypocrites already. I've started to really watch it, and J has too. It makes language a little less fun around the house (cussing is fun!), but it's worth the sacrifice to raise a polite little person. We want her to start out that way, anyway.
The behavior is looking better. More sleep = more happy all around.
We are now deep in the phase called Monkey See, Monkey Do, with a subtitle of Monkey Hear, Monkey Say.
For the most part, it's nothing but super cute. Seeing her do really sweet and affectionate things based on how she is treated is very encouraging. She holds her toddler mirror up to us and we see that we are actually doing some things right! We are making progress toward the main goal of raising a good human. Yay!
We also see behavior that I hope continues forever. She is the best helper around the house. We can't unload the dishwasher, do the dishes, sweep the floor or unload the groceries without her coming running from the other end of the house to help. And, she's actually pretty helpful! Keep it up, little lady. Mama likes a good helper, and Daddy's not always into it.
She is hanging on every word, even when we think she's not listening. We talk a lot around here, to each other, and to her, and she seems to have a great ability for language. She talks - all the time. She talks in full, multiple word sentences. She talks in past, present and future tense, in first, second and third person. She sounds out the letters of the alphabet. She can spell her name. Every day she says new words that we have no idea where they came from. Strangers can even mostly understand what she's saying. It's amazing, and impressive.
She has also repeated some words, in the correct context and with maximum impact, that she'd better never say in preschool or in front of anyone else. Words that bring deep shame into the hearts of her parents, who know it's wrong, but let them fly in front of her anyway. Words that will get her, and definitely her parents, the wrong kind of reputation. Words that leave us speechless, and that leave her extremely satisfied because she knows she just got away with it. She's a smart cookie, and the child of a couple of soon-to-be-reformed trucker mouths.
The first time the words come out in her sweet little voice, it's all we can do not to laugh because it's so adorable. But we can't encourage this, right? We are such hypocrites already. I've started to really watch it, and J has too. It makes language a little less fun around the house (cussing is fun!), but it's worth the sacrifice to raise a polite little person. We want her to start out that way, anyway.
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Time Out
A piece of hot dog hits the floor. Even though I'm on my computer across the table, I see it fall. I can see her with my special peripheral mom vision, looking at me with her big eyeballs, daring me to stop her.
Without looking up, I say, "A - DO NOT throw your food on the floor. If you're done, just get down."
She drops the rest of the hot dog pieces onto the floor and sweeps her arm across the table so that the plate and the rest of the food nearly follows. With my swift super mom speed, I catch her arm, just in time, before the plate crashes on the ground.
"Are you done with your food?"
She grabs a piece of cheese, goes to put it in her mouth, but then throws it down on the table. I get her out of her chair.
"I want you to pick up that hot dog."
She scurries away to the corner of the kitchen.
"Ok, pick it up or you get a time out. Do you want a time out?"
This can go either way. Some days, she says, NOOOOOOO. No time out. And she just picks it up. But not today. Today, she's in the mood to play games.
"Yes," she says with a big teasing smile, "I want a time out. Will you take me into my room?"
"Ok, go into your room. I will not carry you. You can stay in there until you want to pick up your hot dog. Do not come out until then."
She happily trots off to her room and shuts the door. It takes her 30 minutes, but eventually she trots back out and happily picks up all the hot dog and throws it in the trash. She's a stubborn little goat, but I am a big stubborn goat, and I've been at it longer. I don't want to step on hot dog bits, but I'm also not the little goat's servant.
Oh, the fortitude this parenting takes!
Without looking up, I say, "A - DO NOT throw your food on the floor. If you're done, just get down."
She drops the rest of the hot dog pieces onto the floor and sweeps her arm across the table so that the plate and the rest of the food nearly follows. With my swift super mom speed, I catch her arm, just in time, before the plate crashes on the ground.
"Are you done with your food?"
She grabs a piece of cheese, goes to put it in her mouth, but then throws it down on the table. I get her out of her chair.
"I want you to pick up that hot dog."
She scurries away to the corner of the kitchen.
"Ok, pick it up or you get a time out. Do you want a time out?"
This can go either way. Some days, she says, NOOOOOOO. No time out. And she just picks it up. But not today. Today, she's in the mood to play games.
"Yes," she says with a big teasing smile, "I want a time out. Will you take me into my room?"
"Ok, go into your room. I will not carry you. You can stay in there until you want to pick up your hot dog. Do not come out until then."
She happily trots off to her room and shuts the door. It takes her 30 minutes, but eventually she trots back out and happily picks up all the hot dog and throws it in the trash. She's a stubborn little goat, but I am a big stubborn goat, and I've been at it longer. I don't want to step on hot dog bits, but I'm also not the little goat's servant.
Oh, the fortitude this parenting takes!
Saturday, September 21, 2013
Watch Yo Mind
I know I've talked a bit about this before, but I was a practicing Buddhist for over a decade and I miss it. I miss the shiny Buddhas, I miss all my friends, I miss teaching and listening to teachings, and I miss the quiet and peace of mind! Oh boy do I miss that.
Today, they had a celebration at the temple for 20 years of this lineage being in Seattle. It was a big deal. I never go to the temple anymore, but despite my migraine I knew I couldn't miss it. I wanted to take A, of course, because those friends were such a big part of my life in my journey up until she came along, and they are all curious about why I disappeared to be a Mom.
So, as they do, they started with some prayers and then a series of speakers, people who were instrumental in developing the center talking all about the history. I don't know why, but I thought it would be fine to bring A into the temple. I was so determined that I just didn't think it through. She can't sit still for five minutes for any reason, so there's no way she was going to do it for an hour or more. I didn't even consider that bringing her out in public sometimes can be downright harrowing, and this place requires even more discipline than the average public situation.
As I'm sitting there with of all my dear friends and teachers, in front of an eight foot Buddha, I'm just white-knuckling it, trying to relax, while my sweet child engaged in the following activities:
- Began to cry when I closed my eyes and sang prayers
- Talked, out loud, the entire time. A running commentary.
- Took my phone and enjoyed getting into my work email, trolling through my contacts, texting a friend (who was also in the audience), purchased an app, did a number of extensive Bing searches for who-knows-what, updated both my Facebook photo (twice) and my status, and looked up the location of neighborhood bars.
- Announced that she was looking for pictures of Muppets (loudly)
- Took off my necklace and swung it around
- Dug in my purse and got out a mirror, put it on her face and declared it a mask (loudly)
- Harassed the woman in front of us (who was very kind and sweet to her)
- Put her hands on the stained glass windows
- Walked to the front to stare at/charm the speaker
- Fell out of her chair
- Laughed out loud when the monk was talking about building more Dharma centers around the world (the crowd LOVED this)
- And, finally, took the keys out of my purse and attempted to stick them in an electrical outlet
When the keys were ripped (as delicately as possible) out of her hands, she began to whine in her monster voice. That's when I decided we've had enough and we both busted out the door with as much grace as I could muster.
For 45 minutes, I'm thinking about the quality of my mind. Buddha says to be patient, compassionate and practice contentment. I'm sitting right in front of Buddha, and I'm starting to get super tense and irritated with my kid's antics. I'm also pretty self-conscious about not being "that mother", who lets her kid run wild at inappropriate times. I'm desperately trying to find a balance here, and I'm running out of luck. She's either going to cool it, or she's not. Either way, I need to stay calm and respectful about the situation, to my fellow Buddhists, and to her. Maybe I don't get to hear the whole thing, and that has got to be ok.
I'm thankful for being able to be there as long as I did. I'm making a note about bringing A to the temple when she's a little older, and maybe trying to sneak in some time to go by myself. I'm also unbelievably grateful that I had over a decade of practice training my mind, because without it, my messy toddler-raising world would be way more out of control than it already is.
Today, they had a celebration at the temple for 20 years of this lineage being in Seattle. It was a big deal. I never go to the temple anymore, but despite my migraine I knew I couldn't miss it. I wanted to take A, of course, because those friends were such a big part of my life in my journey up until she came along, and they are all curious about why I disappeared to be a Mom.
So, as they do, they started with some prayers and then a series of speakers, people who were instrumental in developing the center talking all about the history. I don't know why, but I thought it would be fine to bring A into the temple. I was so determined that I just didn't think it through. She can't sit still for five minutes for any reason, so there's no way she was going to do it for an hour or more. I didn't even consider that bringing her out in public sometimes can be downright harrowing, and this place requires even more discipline than the average public situation.
As I'm sitting there with of all my dear friends and teachers, in front of an eight foot Buddha, I'm just white-knuckling it, trying to relax, while my sweet child engaged in the following activities:
- Began to cry when I closed my eyes and sang prayers
- Talked, out loud, the entire time. A running commentary.
- Took my phone and enjoyed getting into my work email, trolling through my contacts, texting a friend (who was also in the audience), purchased an app, did a number of extensive Bing searches for who-knows-what, updated both my Facebook photo (twice) and my status, and looked up the location of neighborhood bars.
- Announced that she was looking for pictures of Muppets (loudly)
- Took off my necklace and swung it around
- Dug in my purse and got out a mirror, put it on her face and declared it a mask (loudly)
- Harassed the woman in front of us (who was very kind and sweet to her)
- Put her hands on the stained glass windows
- Walked to the front to stare at/charm the speaker
- Fell out of her chair
- Laughed out loud when the monk was talking about building more Dharma centers around the world (the crowd LOVED this)
- And, finally, took the keys out of my purse and attempted to stick them in an electrical outlet
When the keys were ripped (as delicately as possible) out of her hands, she began to whine in her monster voice. That's when I decided we've had enough and we both busted out the door with as much grace as I could muster.
For 45 minutes, I'm thinking about the quality of my mind. Buddha says to be patient, compassionate and practice contentment. I'm sitting right in front of Buddha, and I'm starting to get super tense and irritated with my kid's antics. I'm also pretty self-conscious about not being "that mother", who lets her kid run wild at inappropriate times. I'm desperately trying to find a balance here, and I'm running out of luck. She's either going to cool it, or she's not. Either way, I need to stay calm and respectful about the situation, to my fellow Buddhists, and to her. Maybe I don't get to hear the whole thing, and that has got to be ok.
I'm thankful for being able to be there as long as I did. I'm making a note about bringing A to the temple when she's a little older, and maybe trying to sneak in some time to go by myself. I'm also unbelievably grateful that I had over a decade of practice training my mind, because without it, my messy toddler-raising world would be way more out of control than it already is.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Spider Town
The spider population around here is tremendous! There is one big mama in particular that gives me shudders. I don't quite have the heart to rip her web down because it's not really in my way, and I know she's just trying to live. I also fear that if I pulled on it, she could come swinging down and smack me in the face (or anywhere on my body!). Oh man, she is intimidating.
Also, I am glad I'm not another spider. And this is why - there you are, just minding your own business, trying to rebuild after the rain.
And BLAM! She snaps you up, spins you furiously, and crushes you into a little ball. (This is where I start to scream, just a little.)
Also, I am glad I'm not another spider. And this is why - there you are, just minding your own business, trying to rebuild after the rain.
You get a little too close to big mama...
And BLAM! She snaps you up, spins you furiously, and crushes you into a little ball. (This is where I start to scream, just a little.)
Pretty soon you are a tiny, unrecognizable snack. (I can't believe I've just witnessed this, and I start to back up and get A into the house, quickly!)
This is A's take on the whole thing: "Don't worry Mama. She won't eat you. It will be ok. I will save you!"
And this is where I realize my toddler is more mature than I am. Oh boy.
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